Principle 2

“Men are Attracted to Us Because We’re WOMEN”

Yes, yes, I know this one sounds pretty self-evident too. But bear with me here – it gets better. 

Have you ever experienced the phenomenon of the Sex-Changing Friend? 

I have. In fact, before I got savvy, I was actually guilty of this a few times myself. 

I’ll explain what I’m talking about – and it’s not an actual, physical sex change. It’s a lot more insidious than that. 

Some women, when they find a guy they really like, undergo a perplexing metamorphosis. 

They begin to scuff off their own personalities, hobbies, interests, and pastimes, and replace them with the personality, hobbies, interests, and pastimes of their new lover. 

Effectively, they change themselves emotionally and psychologically into a man – and not just any man, but the man that they’re now dating. 

Their friends are confused and dismayed – but, trust me, not as much as the guy is! 

All he can think is, “Hey – where’d she go?” 

The woman that he was attracted to has vanished into thin air – to be replaced with a strange version of him. A version of him with breasts and a vagina, but near-identical tastes, interests, preferences, reactions, and sense of humor. 

This behavior – the I-Like-You-So-I’ll-Become-You trait - is all too common, and it’s death to a budding relationship. 

TAKE ME TO THE BOOK 

I think some women do this out of insecurity – they feel, deep down, that there’s safety in similarity. They’re not comfortable maintaining their own personal standards and character traits, so they take on the traits of the guy they’re dating, thinking, “Well, if he does it, surely he’ll like it if I do it, too!” 

Fact: guys are not attracted to you because you resemble them. 

They don’t want to date another guy – least of all one who’s just like them! 

Men want to date women. And women are, by definition, completely different to men. 

Now, I’m not saying that if you are genuinely interested in the things a man is interested in, that you should pretend you’re not in the interests of “being feminine” – that would be self-defeating. 

What I am saying is that you should never feel guilty, apologize for, or attempt to conceal your womanliness and your own personality. 

Women are mysterious creatures to men – and a lot of the time, that unexplained essence of femininity is what men find so appealing. 

Don’t pretend to be interested in shooting ranges, soccer pitches, or car racing if you’re not. Don’t feel bad for spending time on your hair, makeup, or appearance. And don’t pretend that you’re not interested in women’s literature, fashion, girly nights, and trashy magazines if you actually are. 

Whatever you are, that’s OK. Don’t cover yourself up! Femininity – no matter what shape or form it comes in - is sexy. And you don’t have to worry about conforming to societal standards of femininity, either: you’re a woman. Therefore, anything you do is “feminine”! 

Learn to embrace your natural femininity, and use it like the advantage it is – a valuable resource in the dating game! 

That’s enough on Principle #2. Now let’s take a look at what we’ll be covering in Principle #3... 

TAKE ME TO THE BOOK